Revelation

While talking to someone today, I had a revelation.  It was so strong it brought tears to my eyes.  About a month ago, I wrote about having an identity crisis.  I realized today that maybe I'm really not. That maybe that person is still somewhere deep inside me and that she's just been buried down deep.  I believe a lot of this has to do with moving away from Vermont.  Anyone who knows me, knows that I have very strong beliefs about almost everything, (food, animals, environment, parenting, etc.).  I realized that those beliefs or ethics or lifestyle, whatever you want to call them are who I am at my core.  When C and I moved to Vermont almost 10 years ago, I think we both felt like we could finally be ourselves.  Almost like we had found a place we were both comfortable to be as we were and there was a community, and people who shared these "beliefs" so to speak.  (I think it's okay to speak for him too- if not C, let me know)  It was an amazing feeling.   Being here in Ohio, I feel like my "beliefs" are constantly challenged.  I am in no way saying that any one is doing or saying something intentionally, it's just very different from how I live and how I want Sophia to grow up.  My goal and hope is to move back there someday.  I wanted Sophia to grow up there and go to school there.  By no means is Vermont perfect, but it was perfect enough for me.  The good news is I never truly lost myself. My challenge now is to somehow live here and not "lose" myself or my beliefs.  I need to find like minded people and do the things that are important to me and that I want to teach Sophia. I need  to do things that are important to me again.  It's not going to be easy, but I'm going to try.  To all of you reading who live in VT, I miss you and we'll be back again someday!